How Emotional Triggers Can Lead to True Inner Peace

Emotional Triggers: The Hidden Path to Emotional Freedom

Do you have triggers—buttons that, when pushed, send you into emotional outer space?

What if those very triggers were not a problem to fix…

but the doorway to your emotional freedom?

You know the feeling. Someone says or does something, and suddenly you freeze.

Your chest tightens.

There’s a lump in your throat.

A knot forms in your stomach.

Or maybe your mind goes completely blank—no words, no clarity, just reactivity.

For me, one of my biggest triggers used to be hearing:

“You’re not listening.”

Being misunderstood and then judged lit me up instantly. After working with my releasing process, that trigger no longer has power over me—but it once did.

We’ve been taught that when someone makes us angry, they are wrong and they need to apologize.But what if they aren’t actually responsible for our emotional reaction?

A Different Way to Look at Forgiveness

What I’m about to share may feel controversial—and that’s okay.

This isn’t meant to be an academic argument. It’s meant to be experiential.

My own journey has taken me through many perspectives on forgiveness:

• The traditional Christian belief that forgiveness is required for salvation and restored relationships

• The idea of universal forgiveness—that everything is already forgiven

• Understanding that forgiveness and trust are not the same thing

• The A Course in Miracles (ACIM) teaching that forgiveness is seeing through the illusion to recognize that no real harm occurred

• And finally… realizing there may be no need for forgiveness at all

  
  

I know—preposterous, right?

I arrived here through deep self-inquiry—learning to see through the mental illusions that once caused emotional triggers to arise in the first place.

Taking Things Personally (Where Triggers Begin)

If you feel offended enough to believe you need to forgive someone, it’s a strong indicator that you’ve been triggered.

Pause for a moment and reflect:

Have you ever reacted from a triggered state?

How did that turn out?

In my experience, interacting from that energetic place never leads to peace or clarity.

One of the Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz is “Don’t take anything personally.”

If you’re easily offended, chances are you’re taking things personally.

But can you see how what others do is not actually about you?

Even if someone intended to hurt you, that decision reflects what was happening inside them, not your worth or value.

As ACIM beautifully states:

“Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal exists. Therein lies the peace of God.”

You are not your body.

You are not your thoughts.

You are not your emotions.

The real you cannot be harmed.

From this perspective, negative emotion is simply energy with the label “suffering” attached. (I distinguish physical pain from suffering, which is created through mental and emotional resistance.)

A Simple Experiment That Can Change Everything

Let’s try something together.

Think of a time when someone did something that triggered you.

Recently, I went to do some work and found my work tables left dirty by someone else. I was instantly irritated.

Had I interacted with that person in that moment, I would have regretted it.

Instead, I paused.

I asked myself:

• What am I feeling right now?

• Can I allow this irritation to be here without judging it?

• Does this feel personal?

And just like that—the charge dissolved.

Once I saw that it wasn’t personal, the emotion unraveled on its own.

But what if someone did intend to take advantage of you or irritate you?

Even then, their behavior reflects their internal state and choices—not you.Anger isn’t required.

What Anger Is Actually Trying to Do

Anger and fear (and all their emotional cousins) are protective mechanisms.They create internal walls to help us feel safe.

But safe from what?

These mechanisms don’t create peace or harmony—internally or externally.

I lived in an abusive relationship for years and existed in a constant state of low-level fear, resistance, and anger without even realizing it. Those emotional walls helped me survive—until they didn’t.

Eventually, I realized nothing I did would change the situation.

So I chose to remove myself.

And once I did, the anger fell away.It was no longer useful.

So ask yourself:

How is your anger serving you?

I didn’t need to stay angry. I needed clarity—and the courage to act.

Responding From Calm Instead of Reactivity

In the case of the dirty tables, I simply cleaned them. No big deal.

In deeper situations, you may need to:

• Have a calm conversation

• Set a boundary

• Or remove yourself entirely

  
  

But I strongly recommend releasing the emotional charge before taking action.

Trying to resolve anything while emotionally charged is like throwing gas on a fire.

Calm clarity creates very different outcomes.

You are not here to have others regulate your emotions for you.

The work I do supports self-empowerment—so you’re no longer living as a victim of circumstances or other people.

The Releasing Process (Simple and Effective)

Here’s the process I use and teach:

1. Trigger – You notice emotional charge arising

2. Awareness – Bring attention to the feeling without judgment

3. Allow – Let the emotion be fully felt without pushing it away

   • Imagine a door opening where you feel the emotion

   • No force—just permission

4. Release – Ask gentle questions such as:“Would I let this go, just for now?”

5. Action (or not) – Respond from clarity if needed

   
   

Simplified:Trigger → Awareness → Allow → Release → Action

Most people get stuck in the releasing step. This is where having a guide or partner can make a profound difference.

Final Thought

Your triggers aren’t evidence that something is wrong with you.They’re invitations—to awareness, freedom, and self-trust.

And freedom doesn’t come from fixing yourself.It comes from seeing clearly.

If something in this resonated, it may be an invitation to go deeper. Support can make the releasing process feel safer, easier, and more effective.

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